The Fear Of Rejection 

  

Last week I wrote about what rejection is and the different forms of rejection. I dealt with the fact that when a person accepts the wound of rejection in their lives, it generates the fear of rejection and self rejection. In this article, I will be  dealing with the characteristics of the fear of rejection.

When a person is wounded by rejection, they recoil at the prospect of being wounded again. The characteristics of the fear of rejection are as follows;

  • Anger

Anger always follows closely behind fear. When a person accepts rejection, they become dependent upon anger as it becomes an excellent barrier to protect them from future rejection of others. This was something I struggled with for years, when I just migrated from Jamaica especially after I was sexually assaulted at the age of 12, I had outbursts of anger, I always got in major arguments on the estate I lived on, and there were times I was close to getting into physical fights. I never fought the girls it was the guys that I went after. When someone would upset me I created a movie in my mind as to how I would make them pay. The metamorphosis that I have just been through took care of the anger that I carried for so many years, God gave me the opportunity to exchange my pain with His peace and love.

  • Hardness

Hardness is another defence mechanism that keeps people away. It’s this “I can do bad all by myself” attitude but deep down inside there is a cry for someone to love you. I experienced this and it took the circumstances of life to bring me to a place of surrender and my prayer became that of Ezekiel 36:26-27. I started asking God to give me a new heart and a new spirit and this is where God started the process of healing.

  • Bitterness

This is where you get bitter  about the situation in which you were wounded. Anger left unattended will start to generate a root of bitterness.

  • Rebellion

Rebellion is an outward expression caused by an inner feeling of rejection. The society that we are now living in where the youth are being classed as rebellious, where a lot of false religions and occultic movements are on the rise are. as a result of rejection. Today’s generation is the fruit of the decisions of yesterday’s generation. Because the older generation have not sought out help to deal with their issues of rejection, it has just been passed down throughout their generations. What this root of rejection has birthed are people suffering with all types of addictions, self harming, joining groups that only seek to manipulate and control and cares nothing about their wellbeing. What this root of rejection has birthed is a generation of people who no longer has a sense of purpose and if they do these wounds act as a barrier to them fulfilling their purpose. Because of this, today’s new age movement, satanic worshippers and cults are able to recruit these people dealing with the wounds of rejection. That is why we have people who have tasted and have witnessed the awesome power of the Holy Ghost just turn away from the church and renounce the name of Jesus, this is what the root of rejection is doing to those who experience it. When the fear of rejection has established a stronghold in a person, they will start to reject others before being rejected themselves. This attitude generates an inability to receive love or to love others. And from this grows rebellion.

  • Addiction

A person can become an addict when they have experienced rejection and when they are unsuccessful in their attempt to reconnect to a loving relationship, they anesthetise their pain, this can be through drugs, sex, self destructive habits such as self harming, eating disorders and many more habits. You see when love is denied somebody, the door is open for satan to step in. 

I pray that these points have helped you identify what happens when a person has the fear of rejection. It is my prayer that God will heal every wound of rejection that may have manifested in one of these characteristics. Know that God loves you and that He accepts you. He died for you and He is waiting to deliver you and heal you of your wounds but He can only do this if you let Him in. 

God bless you and thank you for reading.

This study on rejection was sourced via http://www.isob-bible.org

The Pain Of Rejection 

  
For the last week, I have been carrying this topic in my spirit. I started to feel the burden of those who have and are currently suffering from the pain of rejection. The Lord started dealing with me on the effects of rejection especially on the body of Christ. I have to be honest, I ran away from this subject because I discovered in 2015 that this was the root of a lot of my personal life experience where God had to take me  through a process of healing; but the Holy Ghost got a hold of me and I had to surrender because I realised that there are souls out there who are crying out in silence because they have been rejected by loved ones, their spiritual leaders and even certain groups within society and this has left a huge impact on them which has prevented them from tapping into their full potential due to fear of being rejected . Rejection is the root of most problems that humans face today. Love propels a person to do great things but rejection blocks a person’s potential.

So What Is Rejection? 

Rejection is the dismissing or refusing of a proposal idea-It is the action of spurning a person’s affection. Feeling rejected is the opposite of feeling accepted- it is the denial of love and acceptance in one’s life. Rejection and the fear of rejection plays a major part in the development of the character of every human being- one of the products of rejection is a broken spirit. Rejection is one of the most neglected, yet one of the most common emotional wounds from which one suffers. There are different forms of rejection:

  • Slighting
  • Shunning 
  • Spurning
  • Denial
  • Ignoring
  • Neglecting
  • Avoiding and Disapproving

Love is an essential need in every human being’s life. God designed it that way that we would need each other and we would need love. As people grow spiritually, they are able to handle rejection better than they could when they were young but it does not diminish how painful rejection is. No matter how old or young you are rejection still hurts. People who experience rejection, tend to react by building walls. I have discovered that rejection is a perception issue, it may not have been intended but that is how it was perceived. Rejection has to be accepted for it to have an effect on a person’s life. Rejection requires a reaction for it to bring forth fruit in a person’s life. If I don’t respond to rejection then it is not rejection at all. My mentor told me a few years ago that running after someone who has rejected you adds more to your pain but if you are not running after the rejector, then rejection has no effect on you.

When a person accepts the wound of rejection in their lives, it generates one of two things-

  1. Fear of Rejection- when a person is wounded by rejection, they recoil at the prospect of being wounded again. For example, a person who has been wounded by an authority figure in their lives, their natural reaction is to fear authority and guard themselves when they are in the presence of authority figures. The fear of being hurt causes the individual to put up defence mechanisms and this is where the development of distrust for everyone’s motives take place.
  2. Self Rejection- After a person has accepted rejection in their lives for an extended period of time, they begin to reject themselves. They start believing that they are unworthy and unacceptable by others. Both the fear of rejection and self rejection controls one’s behaviour which then starts generating unhealthy fruit. Rejection from loved ones will make one think that they are unacceptable or unqualified or unworthy. 

I will be dealing with rejection over the next few weeks. In my next blog , I will be dealing with the characteristics of the fear of rejection and self rejection. God bless you and thank you for reading.

Study on rejection was conducted on http://www.isob-bible.org.

On Your Mark Get Set & Accelerate 

  

Still focusing on the subject of acceleration, I am truly excited about the acceleration that is about to take place in the lives of many this year. The Lord started dealing with me on the principles and the laws of physics relating to acceleration, so He had me researching what has to happen in order for a plane to lift off and fly. An airplane in flight is the centre of a continuous tug of war between four forces:

  • Lift
  • Gravity force or weight
  • Thrust
  • Drag 

Lift and drag are considered aerodynamic forces because they exist due to the movement of the aircraft through the air. The weight pulls down on the plane opposing the lift created by air flowing over the wing. Thrust is then generated by the propeller and opposes drag caused by air resistance to the frontal area of the airplane. During takeoff, thrust must overcome drag and lift must overcome the weight before the airplane can become airborne.  When the plane is in level flight at constant speed, thrust exactly equals drag and lift exactly equals the weight or gravity force. How does this apply to everyday living in 2016, 2015 was a trying year for many, it was a year of change and repositioning but it was necessary for what will take place in 2016.  In 2016 there will be uncommon favour, there will be a quantum leap but for this to take place there will be opposing forces but you have to know when to stand still and when to move. Last year when I was on the plane travelling to Jamaica, it moved from the terminal and it started moving towards where it would lift off. I noticed we had to wait for a few minutes then the plane started moving really fast then we were in the air .  

What am I saying there will be some opposing forces that will try to come at you, I can feel it even now as I am typing this that some of you are facing opposition, be of good cheer you are being positioned for lift off. That is what will happen in this year, you may feel like things are still going  slow but you are being positioned for lift off. For favour to shine bright in your life, things have to be shaky that’s the only way God can get the glory. In this season, no one can get the glory for what is about to happen in your life. You have to be really careful as to who you connect with in this season as they cannot get the glory for your acceleration. So I hereby declare to you On Your Mark, Get Set, and Accelerate.

God Bless You and Thank You For Reading.

2016- A Year Of Acceleration

  
2015 was a year of transition and change. For me personally, 2015 was a year of major change, losses and grief. On the other hand, it was one of my most productive years to date. In this year, I discovered the real “Me”. However it was at the cost of a high price but it was worth it. There were days when I felt like I was not going to make it. In my season of great vulnerability, I experienced betrayal, mockery, gossip, people looking down on me and through it all the Lord told me to be still. I also experienced some of the greatest people who celebrated me and the gift that God has placed in me.
In August 2015, the Lord kept saying ‘Quantum Leap’, so I proceeded to research the definition of quantum leap which is physics principle.quantum leap is a sudden large increase or advance- it is any sudden and significant change. The Lord started pouring into me that when quantum leap takes place, it is a suddenly- one minute you are broke, the next minute you are wealthy; one minute you are single, the next minute you are engaged to be married. This season is not to be missed and it cannot be taken lightly. It is not by accident that this season of acceleration is happening in the year of Jubilee according to the Jewish calendar 5776. It is a season of restoration where captivity is reversed.  A week before Christmas, the Lord told me to check the calendar for 2016, I noticed it was going to be a leap year and I realised that God was preparing me from August for the New Year.

God showed me that 2015 was a year of positioning, just like in the story of Joseph, he went into the pit then he went to Potiphar’s house only to be accused of rape then thrown into prison. The pit was like a prison so it would seem as if Joseph had gone back to square one or ground level in his life. If you felt like you were demoted or you went back to square one in this year, then I am writing to let you know that 2015 was only positioning you for your leap into purpose in 2016. Joseph’s experiences was only there to position him to meet Pharaoh and provide solutions that he had gained from his monotonous and painful experiences. Your experiences in 2015 will not be wasted, it was only allowed by God to happen to you in order to catapult you into your season of manifestation and acceleration. Time will be restored to you. So in these final 2 days before the new year, I want you to position yourself, spirit, soul and body and remain expectant because God is about to accelerate you beyond your expectations and imagination. Have a happy new year and know that God is with you and He will never leave you or forsake you.

God bless you and thank you for reading.. 

Pregnant With A Dream 

  
The last few days I have been thinking about the process of giving birth. I just launched a dream that God had placed in my heart since May 2013. It felt like I had given birth. Though I have never given birth physically yet, the Lord showed me that I was going through the process of giving birth spiritually. 

When a woman first finds out that she is pregnant, she does not tell everyone, she will wait a few weeks before she announces her good news. When a dream is conceived in you, you have to keep that dream to yourself for a season as there are a group of people out there who have allowed themselves to be employed as dream killers. Guard your dream like your whole life depends on it. Secondly, there is a nine month waiting period after conception. The same day you get the dream, is not the same day you will give birth to it. The waiting period is there to allow the baby to develop and grow, your dream has to be developed and you have to prepare for your dream. The waiting period is there for you to study and to prepare for what you are about to give birth to.Thirdly, the expecting mother starts to change her diet to make sure that both her and her baby are healthy . When a dream is conceived in you, you have to feed it with the word of God, worship and surround yourself with positivity. You cannot allow yourself to be stressed out. Your environment has to be conducive for the growth taking place on the inside of you.

Fourthly, she will start to surround herself with other expecting mothers. Your social circle has to change. You have to surround yourself with other people who are carrying a dream as well. When Mary conceived Jesus, she went to  stay with Elizabeth her cousin who was also expecting; only Elizabeth would have been able to understand the supernatural experience as Elizabeth had a similar experience(Luke 1:39-45).You have to surround yourself with like minded people in this season of your life. There are different symptoms that come with different stages within pregnancy. Most women experience morning sickness and a mirage of other things. When you first conceive your dream, you may have anxiety, you will feel fearful, you will start to disqualify yourself, you will go through emotional changes, you will be happy and excited.The mother’s belly will start to grow as the baby grows, as you grow, your dream will start to grow as well. When you get a dream, you don’t get the full picture, it will start as an embryo, then it will grow until it reaches full term. 

How you know that you are getting ready to give birth to your dream, is that you will start to feel pain in the form of life’s circumstances. You will start to feel braxton hicks (false labour- prepares you for the real birth). When the real labour is here, your waters will break and the pain will intensify. At the beginning of September, I started crying for no reason, the Lord showed me that my waters had broken in the spirit. The warfare became intense, but it was not yet time to push. When a woman’s water is broken, she still has to wait until she is 10cm dilated before she can give birth. I want to encourage you that you are pregnant with a dream. Whether you are 3,6 or 9 months pregnant, hold on because the day for you to give birth is coming. For some of you reading this, your time is now. Stay tuned for part 2.

God bless you and thank you for reading.

Stepping Out Into the Unknown (Part 1)

Stepping Into The Unknown

It was in the month of May 2013, that the Lord gave me the scripture Genesis chapter 12v1. Months later, I started hearing different people preaching on the same scripture and I knew that God was trying to get my attention. I remembered the first time the Lord led me to this scripture, I immediately sensed that the Lord was calling me out of where I was in order to go to another dimension in Him. God  started telling me to resign from different departments I was involved with in my church at the time. I did not understand why. The final ministry He had told me to resign from was the youth department. One year later He told me to hand in my resignation and leave the ministry where I was a minister. The Lord had showed me the city, but He did not tell where I was going to live or how I was going to survive. He told me to go.

In Genesis 12v1, God told Abram to leave his country, his relatives and his father’s house and go to a land that God will show him. It is important to understand that destiny has a place. We are all called to purpose. And if you truly grasp that, then you will experience at some point in your lifetime when God will call you out into the unknown. When this occurs God will either give you a word of instruction or a word of direction. You see, a word of direction is often vague and not very clear whereas a word of instruction is very clear and detailed. Abram was given a word of direction.

Whenever you receive a word of direction, your faith in God is what will be the driving force. It takes courage to step out without clear information. I have found that when God calls you out, He will show you the end of the journey and the blessings that are waiting for you on the other side. He will always show you the promise that is waiting at the end of your obedience. You see this in verses 2-3 of chapter 12. Your miracle is hidden in your obedience to the instruction that God gives you. In verse 4, Abram takes the brave journey and leaves with his wife Sarai and his nephew Lot.

One of the first principles the Lord had taught me in stepping out is that in order to go to the next level, there are some relationships that you have to let go of. It is easier said than done but it is absolutely necessary. The Lord had told Abram to leave his country and his kindred but he still took Lot with him. Partial obedience is still disobedience. Genesis 13v5-6 highlights this point that where you are going, some of your relationships cannot contain or even fathom what God is about to do for you. They cannot handle it. It does not mean they are bad people, t just means that right now in your journey, you have come to a place where you have to go alone. Do not allow guilt to weigh you down. Abraham probably felt the responsibility to bring Lot along with him because Lot’s father had died. But God’s instructions were very clear. When we refuse to let go off of relationships that God has instructed us to, the next thing that will come is strife. In Genesis 13:7, strife came between the herdsmen of Abram and the herdsmen of Lot. Sometimes strife is a blessing because it puts you back on track and onto God’s original plan so that you can accomplish His will for your life.

Abram and Lot separated and Abram stayed in Canaan and Lot pitched his tent toward Sodom. The next thing that happened blew my mind, in verse 14 of chapter 13, the Lord tells Abram to “lift up his eyes and look…..” In verse 15, God makes another promise to Abram. Lot had to leave before God could give him a word of instruction. Whilst he was with Lot, God still spoke with Abram, He still protected Abram when they entered Egypt, but Lot had to go before the plan was unveiled. So my question is, how many of you as a result of disobedience are delaying the word of instruction that the Lord has for you? How many of you are refusing to let go off of dead relationships or relationships that love you so much that they are stifling the very purpose that God has for your life? I am here to declare to you that it is time to arise, step out and step into the destiny that God has for you.

The first requirement of stepping out into the unknown is , letting go of relationships  that is preventing you from moving forward. You have to forsake the old and embrace the new. What you are willing to let go of determines what God will bless you with. I discovered this for myself; the relationships that I have formed since I have moved are priceless. I say this in humility, if I had stayed in the same place holding onto the same people and relationships, I would have missed out on the wealth of relationships and connections that I have now and I know God is only just beginning.

When I transitioned to my new city, the first instruction the Lord gave me was to shut down every communication I had with people and mentors from my previous city. This was hard for me because these relationships meant a lot to me. But God said let go and I did. And can I be honest? It was the best decision of my life, what I know now cannot be compared to what I knew then and I believe that is what had happened to Abram, when he said good bye to the unnecessary weight, that was when he was able to lift up his eyes and look; he was able to handle the instruction of the Lord concerning his life and his household.  It is my prayer that God will give you the courage to step out into the unknown and experience His abundance in Jesus Name Amen. This will be done in a series, because God is pouring a lot into me concerning this topic so stay tuned.

May God bless you and thank you for reading.